I was the anchor and you were the sea
somehow love blossomed between you and me
kept each other from drowning in sadness
if only this life could be so carefree
in early times we chased the sun and moon
wrote love songs to the stars that made
them swoon
but other things hovered in shadows deep
we soon found ourselves lost in the
monsoon
my anchor not strong enough to hold you
I watched you drift away into sea’s blues
in daydreams I meet you under moonlight
where we share kisses, sweet as morning
dew
Nice line: "my anchor not strong enough to hold you". I also like those sweet kisses shared in daydreams.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
Deletebeautiful story with lingering sweet memories. if it ends, best this way...
ReplyDeleteThanks. :)
DeleteI love the anchor and sea metaphor, keeping ‘each other from drowning in sadness’, and the line ’my anchor not strong enough to hold you’ is so poignant.
ReplyDeleteThank you Kim.
DeleteMeeting under the moonlight is a nice, safe alternative to the monsoon.
ReplyDeleteIt certainly is. LOL. Thanks for reading.
DeleteAh, another lost love poem. But not a bitter one, sweet at the end, as long as it does not compete with your present lover. ;-)
ReplyDeleteHaha no. Thanks for reading.
DeleteSad that the anchor was not strong enough to hold on to. Lost in the monsoon was a good metaphor.
ReplyDeleteThanks Grace
DeleteMany of us stretched the parameters of the form--syllable count and rhyme schemes, etc--but no matter.We all try it to stretch ourselves, hoping some piece of the form will influence our future work.
ReplyDeleteVery true. Thanks for commenting
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ReplyDeleteWell crafted Arcadia. Bittersweet, love found love lost. I liked tge nautical theme. You did very well with the 10-syllable lines. I got inspired by this rubaiyat thing and posted two - one dark, one light. Both of mine follow Frost's 8-syllable line format.
ReplyDeleteI like the metaphor - "I was the anchor and you were the sea". Your line flow well, and by repeating the image at the end, you wrap the poem up well.
ReplyDeleteMost especially liked this line
ReplyDelete"wrote love songs to the stars that made them swoon"
It is such a happy line....so very sad to see the demise of the relationship. The turn from this line to the sadness is felt.
the rubaiyat is a beautiful love song here - the sea and the anchor and oh those kisses you sprinkled so wonderfully.
ReplyDeleteActually I find your rubai being very good, each one could stand alone, and describing those different phases... well done.
ReplyDeleteI like the romanticism and sustained metaphor.
ReplyDeleteEnchanting metaphors and the title is perfect. The last two lines are a good reminder that we can still treasure and remember the love we have lost.
ReplyDelete"sweet kisses shared in daydreams" - Beautiful poem, Arcadia!
ReplyDelete